Your 10 year old has been told to tidy up the mess he has left in the sitting room:
His football boots and other sports clobber are strewn everywhere. He is un co-operative, and complains that you are always on at him.
You say that is not true at all, what you are asking him to do is perfectly reasonable.
He says he will do it later because he now has to get on with his project which is due in tomorrow.
You say that is just an excuse, and he is always leaving his stuff lying around, it is not fair on
other members of the family who do tidy up after themselves, and it is not fair on you, why should you have to tidy up his mess all the time, and why can’t he just do as he is told for once without making a fuss.
He is indignant, and says that he does tidy up mostly
But on the rare occasion when he doesn’t you have to come down on him like a ton of bricks, whereas you always let his sister get away with things like that. You reply of course you don’t, that is simply not true….. and so it goes on.
A colleague of mine used to describe this as ‘getting into the ring’
It takes two to sustain an argument
And in this situation you have put your boxing gloves on and are well and truly ‘ in the ring.’
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